NY Habit Change Help

NYE Habit Change Help

Integration is the incarnate implementation of an intention.

Sharing the harvest from my work aiding people with life-changing Integrations, the following frames build upon psychological research into rewards and motivation.

These ‘power ups’ help you bridge the gap between intention and implementation – helping you stick with your habit changes.
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How are your daily habits leading you towards the life you dream of?
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Change your identity :

Psych research demonstrates that the most sustained changes in habit stem directly from a change in your identity / narrative.

For example ~ I am a healthy person who prioritizes physical wellness.

Instead of ~ ‘I can’t eat junk food’ or ‘I need to get in shape’.

This identity change creates congruences across a variety of choices, such as whether to go for a walk, whether to engage in binge eating, and what to get at the grocery store.

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Don’t > Can’t :

‘Don’t’ points to a change in identity and leans on character congruency, ‘can’t’ requires more novel willpower, which you can quickly exhaust, as you only have a certain amount per day.
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Small wins fuel the engine of change :

Break down big goals into small pieces and projects. Create a calendar where you have a visual acknowledgment of success in adding one more link to the ‘chain’ – this creates a lot of inertia to not want to break the ‘streak’.

These little wins keep giving a much-needed motivational dopamine reward boost to keep you going, and don’t end up taking much from the large overall ‘pile’ of dopamine you will receive when you accomplish your big goal.

These little wins keep giving a much-needed motivational dopamine reward boost to keep you going, and don’t end up taking much from the large overall ‘pile’ of dopamine you will receive when you accomplish your big goal.

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Tip jar for good behavior:

Putting a small amount of money into an account when you engage in a healthy habit, such as preparing a good meal, that you can then put towards a related support splurge, like going out to a nice healthy restaurant, helps create a sustaining dopamine reward trickle.

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Take small bites :

Try to make a 1% improvement daily – something manageable, but when in aggregate will add up to a lot.

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Consistency :

If you slip up one day on a habit {such as exercise}, forgive yourself, but ensure you will engage the pattern the next day, so that missing your chosen habit does not become the new pattern! Aka, one day is ok, but double your effort to return to the desired habit the next day.
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Create an easy on-ramp :

If you engage in the behavior you are attempting to move away from, such as having an unhealthy snack, see it as an isolated incident rather than a reason to give up completely. Consider that you may have set your challenge bar too high and see how you can create more intermediate steps to make the change closer to a smooth ramp and less like lunging up a huge step or climbing a steep ladder.
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Increase intertia :
Friction breaks Addiction.

Make the habits you want to increase easier and those that you want to discourage harder. Create space from satisfying your impulses immediately – even if only momentary – like needing to click through a separate folder to access your social media apps, not saving your passwords, or taking the batteries out of the remote and having a book close at hand when you sit down in your ‘relaxing’ spot.
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Pleasurable Physical Triggers / Reminders

Create common pleasurable physical triggers you will come across to encourage your desired behavior. For example, if you would like to drink more water, acquire a vessel you love to touch that is pleasing to you and always have this vessel with you. Tie drinking water with a color such as blue {eg. getting a vessel that is blue} and place blue cups and imagery of water in prominent places, set a timer to go off every hour with a waterfall sound – to encourage you to get out of your chair, stretch and have some water, etc. If there is a negative stimulus affecting your water consumption, such as not enjoying the taste of tap water, gather spring water, or get mineral drops or a healthy electrolyte solution to add to your water.
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Accountabilibuddy :

Someone you check in with that you are externally accountable to often makes the biggest difference, as you are motivated to not disappoint them.
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Reach out if you’d like to explore me being an accountabilibuddy or want help creating supportive structures for change in your life.

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#habitchange #habits #changeyourlife #integration #integrationcoach #lifechange #dopamineboost #willpower #resolutions #motivation #dopamine #goalsetting #rewards

Miraculous Healing

Miraculous healing : “My shoulder/chest is still so loose, and there’s no pain or stiffness anymore…it’s crazy! I just can’t get over how much intense change came from a hug. I’m so grateful that I encountered you and your work – it felt like the most kismet ending to my year.”

Jessica M

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Healing can be immediate and complete, even from lifelong conditions.

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Miracle healings are uncommon because they require deep trust and resonance with the practitioner. This is a subconscious process, as your nervous system chooses on an involuntary wetware level that a practitioner can hold you compassionately in a transformational experience.

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Miracle healings are rare because your nervous system has to become vulnerable enough to be repatterned, when all of it’s past survival wisdom experience is based on that pattern. In essence your ego is {abstractly} trusting your life with the practitioner.

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You have to trust a practitioner enough to protect you while you become the former-caterpillar-not-yet-butterfly structureless goo inside the cocoon to experience the complete liberation from the old subconscious structural scaffolding to rapidly crystallizing a new aš yet untested form. This is a high bar and rightfully and wisely so, as there are those who would prey upon your vulnerability instead of honoring your soft sovereignty.

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May we all find fun facilitators to flourish into our inherent wholeness.

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Grateful to be a corporeal creator + incarnate innovator on the evolving edge of therapeutic touch.

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Reach out if you feel resonance.

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X in @imbodhi.co cocoon

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#miraclehealing #healingmiracles #healing #healer #somatichealing #somatichealer #somatictherapy #somatictherapist #bodywork #bodyworker #contactimprovisation #contactimprov #physicaltherapy #physicalintelligence #healingtouch #touchtherapy #touch

Comedy Alchemy : Curative Clowning

photo by Ariel DuBov of X in Imbodhi

Comedy Alchemy : Curative Clowning

In the jester’s path to peace, those around you are invited to join in the belly laughs of a humorous harvest from previously heavy harm – Comedy Alchemy.
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In aiding patients to integrating inner harmony, health, and values alignment, I often utilize an internal family systems // parts work frame to bring out the characters that are ‘driving the bus’ of your life.
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If you find that your bus driver is steering you somewhere suspect, try to turn them into a vivid character, find out the wisdom they are trying to convey {often something they are protecting you from, or a misguided attempt to get a need met}, and find a more prosocial way to give them the support or acknowledgement they crave.
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Here is a technique I invented employing this frame that has helped many patients understand who is driving your bus and regain control of the wheel in a fun way :
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Trauma drama :
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What if your parts // character{s} were in a Broadway production // reality TV show // soap opera?
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On stage, you must amplify all aspects of your expression – so the audience in the back can see + sense your character.
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How can you turn up the dial to 11 – ridiculously out of proportion? Act as if you are on a reality TV show and the producers are pushing for higher drama for ratings. .

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Caricature your character – leaning into lampooning. This expansion allows the nuances of the issue to inflate, and this increase in size allows the details of your character and context to be fully seen, felt, and expressed.
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When the previously entangled energy is egregiously expanded, you gain the neutrality of spacious distance through not personally over-identifying with this overblown character.

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Describe this part : what is their name ? what are they wearing? what are their catchphrases {to know when it is their voice speaking to you}? how can you tell when they are driving your bus?
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Ariel Dubov
of X in IMBŌDHI Activewear
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#internalfamilysystems#ifs#partswork#ifstherapy#therapy#therapymemes#traumahealing#traumatherapy#traumawork#therapytools#psychologicalsupport#arttherapy#traumatherapy#dramatherapy#traumadrama #comedytherapy

Character change via clothing

Character change via clothing

Actualizing aspiration via authoring an avatar & adorning accordingly .

In therapeutic spaceholding & incarnate integration work aiding patients in creating a character to step into supports personality // pattern change.

Conceptualizing your desired future self as a character creates the required reflective psychological distance to disentangle from your past narrative so that a new story has spaciousness to be spun.

Aka multisensory future forward narrative therapy.

This deep habit change work is most immediately integrated with repetition as ‘neurons that fire together wire together’.

Thus linking change to clothing creates a material multiplier effect via frequent physical reminders {eg. color, form, movement memories}.

Additionally, when we externalize our aspirations via our enrobed expression we exponentially expand our pool of allies to include all those we come across who witness our adornment and are altered in the manner they interact with us, or when they ask about the significance of dress and we get to verbalize our values.

This is a throwback video of my creativity doula meta character :: the movement muse.

As a Movement Muse I inspire and support you in motivational movement, magnetizing you towards your goals via embodied empowerment.

Call it body based physipsychological counseling // corporeal coaching 😉

How has your clothing helped you create change in your life?

.Video by Liliana Astiz & Kenny Hoff

Trauma-healing threads :: nervous-system regulating garments

photo  by Darren Smith

Trauma-healing threads :: nervous-system regulating garments

Our attire can be a soothing second skin that helps us nourish our nervous system via : warmth, compression, weight, texture, bilateral motion, modulating sensory stimulation, space for deep belly breaths, breathability for skin, & supporting a sense of safety.

While capitalism encourages us to procure items designed for nervous system regulation such as weighted vests // blankets + compression clothing, to be eco-responsible we can also create the same effects by layering or altering the items we already own {eg. adding a heavy liner to a favorite jacket}.

We can sew textured pockets + patches onto beloved garb to create a diverse sensory diet & we can even fill our new pouches with ancient fidget toys such as worry stones or gifts to lubricate social interactions and thus reduce social anxiety. Alterations can also create safety, for example in my SA trauma healing process, I created hidden interior pockets to hold my phone & practiced dialing 911 unseen from within my clothing by touch.

We can provide ourselves with avenues for titrating // reducing sensory input through hoods, scarves, or hats, modulating the level of stimulation based on our surroundings.

This handmade piece is called the BodyBow { after BrainBow hat…welcoming new naming suggestions!? }. The woolen warmth, compression of contour cocooning design, & empathetic engaged energy elicited from those beholding the BodyBow – all serve to regulate into rapture, revelious raiments attracting additional adventurous atelier aliens.

How do you regulate your nervous system with your clothing?

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 by Darren Smith while in the midst of speaker worshipping Robot Heart ‘s #funktionone system

#burningman #burningmanfestival#burningmanstyle #burningman2021  #burner #burningmanfashion #burningmancostume #burningmanhat #burningmanphotography #burningmanart #knittersofinstagram #knitted #handmadewardrobe #handmadefashion #handmadestyle #handmadeartist #handmadeart #futurefashion #slowfashion #slowfashionmovement #ootd #ootdfashion #psychedelicfashion #psychedelicartist #psychedelicart #psychedelicartwork #psychedelicclothing #fabricart #ooak

Integration Incarnate : Dress to Access : Adornment as Amplifier

Integration Incarnate : Dress to Access : Adornment as Amplifier


Beyond accompanying you in underground spaces of soul-sprouting as a guardian angel, the bulk of my therapeutic support work involves weaving the wisdom you discover into material metaphors that serve as embodied engagement // physical reminders of your insights : Integration Incarnate..To guide you in identifying your own motivational mythology, I inquire as to what colors, sensations, textures, or movements represent realizations. Then, alongside you as a stitch witch, we craft costume, somatic sigils {movement metaphors}, & environmental empowerment to engage change..I encourage you to imbue jewelry, clothing, & other easily worn objects as embodied echoes of empowering experiences or ‘power pieces’ to be worn on occasions that have a higher likelihood of being triggering // challenging..
Dress as a Work in Progress : Adornment can be Aspirational

Consider the characteristics you wish to step into – what wardrobe evokes this embodiment for you?

Do you wish to feel grounded ? Choose a heavy coat that provides weight + compression for nervous system regulation.

Do you wish to feel protected ? Choose adornment armor – such as layers or a large protruding ring.

I dress to express + coalesce community :

This handmade BrainBow is my soul in hat form. Although abnormal adornment can be vulnerable, a community has coalesced around this chapeau – friendships formed + flourished due to the inspiration the BrainBow creates. The purmissionary nature of the BrainBow supports my intention to find playtonic playmates for my shy inner child. 

📸 @dsmithstudio

@robotheartcommunity

Renegade burn 2021

#burningman #burningmanstyle#burningmanfestival #burnerstyle #burner #renegadeburn #customcostumes #customclothing #customcostume #knitting #knitter #handmadecostume #handmadehat #brainbow #psychedelicphotography #psychedelicart #psychedelicfashion #psychedelicfestival #psychedelicartwork #psychedelicartist #integration #psychedelicclothing #psychedelicarts #psychedelicphotos #psychedelicdesign #psychedelicmoods #tripping #stitchwitch #halloweencostume #whimsicalartist

How your subconscious will sabotage your growth if you have unresolved trauma

photo Stefanie Atkinson Schwartz of X in Tashka Design by Natasha Sheveleva

How your subconscious sabotages growth if you have unresolved trauma ::

when being seen // taking up space is unsafe // ‘scary attention’.

AKA :: Research-backed, psychologically-supported trauma informed habit // personality change

For those of us with abuse and trauma in our histories, past protective impulses can derail our growth paths in an attempt to keep us small and safe. For example, in aiding a patient who is wishing to enact changes in their personality who has a childhood trauma history, they recalled getting small and hiding parts of themselves because they did not want to be preyed upon. This patient was experiencing what they thought were ‘irrational’ hesitations // self-sabotage of desired positive growth changes due to fear from the traumatized part of themselves not wishing to risk being seen because ‘being noticed can bring scary attention’.

Holding yourself back due to fear can also occur if you do not have a history of childhood abuse, especially if you are acculturated as female due to pervasive victim blaming culture. You are likely aware of the shame refrain of someone ‘asking for it’ due to their clothing or sensual // embodied personality. Thus, you will blame your behavior on your actions instead of the perpetration.

When attempting to break free of victim blaming // rape culture, reflect that if there were not for the harmful actions, there would be no harm done to those in any type of clothing or its absence.

Keep in mind that these protective impulses arise from an involuntary and well-intentioned past pattern, for when you were young or your body decided that you were not going to be successful in a fight // flight response, your nervous system make the executive decision {outside of your conscious control} to put you into a fawn state to try to appease the more powerful being that was the source of your challenge or fear.

Ways to overcome a self-protective orientation towards fear of being seen // taking up space ::

1. Journal to examine your ‘stories’ around being seen // taking up space : what phrases were told by your caregivers about being seen // taking up space? What formative memories of being seen // taking up space did you experience or witness when you were young? What cultural tales or tropes illustrate this from your background {eg. ‘tall poppies get cut down’; ‘don’t stick your neck out’}?

2. Come up with succinct new phrases // encapsulations to repeat to yourself immediately after the old phrases spring up. Eg. ‘Reach for your sun’ from an movement metaphor of mine : ‘It is of service for me to reach for my sun, as trees do, and in such natural growth I can create an ecosystem for others to thrive beneath my branches.

3. Collect examples in your life of experiences in which your ‘taking up’ space or being seeing was for the greatest good // inspired others, or cautionary tales as to the converse. Write these in a place where you can reference them regularly or when in a moment of doubt.

4. Create a healing team // co-evolutionary community around yourself who holds you to your new intentions. The aid in having an accountabilibuddy cannot be overstated, even if it is just a friend and not professional support.

{This hand-on support, specialized knowledge, and accountability is a large part of why you might choose to hire a specialist // professional accountability force such as a personal trainer, coach, or therapist, so that you have an external person to answer to in holding yourself to your intention}.

{ BONUS : you can replace [ being seen // taking up ] space with any ingrained habit // character change you are trying to adjust, as these techniques will work for most of the deep changes that are hardest to make}

I am so grateful and proud to see the rapid and cathartic changes made in my patients by translating complex psychological studies // concepts into researched-backed behavior change techniques and I want to continue to share these learnings if helpful to you!

Please comment if you would appreciate experiencing this material as a course {have a lot more material // techniques then I shared here} and any thorny challenges you have experienced with habit change you are seeking support with!

Grateful to be the wind beneath your wings as a supportive upward spiral // co-evolutionary current.

facebook post for additional discussion

Flee from traumatizing social conventions

FLEE FROM TRAUMATIZING SOCIAL CONVENTIONS : LET YOURSELF GET AWAY TO PREVENT DIS-EASE.

📸Stefanie Atkinson Schwartz of X in Tashka Design

Don’t just walk, run from noxious stimuli ::

Permission for freedom in flight ::

How holding back our involuntary nervous system impulses calcifies // freezes trauma in the body.

We are humanimals {= human + animals}, and as animals, evolution has preserved behaviors within our involuntary nervous system patterns that have enabled us to survive, such as the alarm responses of : fight // flight // freeze // fawn // faint. These responses only get transformed into trauma when we suppress their full expression or do not reset our nervous systems after allowing the reaction..

Non-humanimals shake after activation responses {watch a dog, cat, deer, etc, after it has been reprimanded or startled}.

Unfortunately, our repressive humanimal culture does not welcome these ‘bizarre behaviors’ // weave the wisdom of how to regulate our nervous systems into our social web, hence the need for healers such as myself.

Among other hands on interventions with my patient yesterday, the piece that was most impactful was giving them PERMISSION TO RUN.

Although it is not a common social script to allow your body to flee a noxious stimulus and may be seen as ‘eccentric’ {when what is actually strange is clamping down on the natural response}, I invite you to allow yourself to create space from anything that is causing you to have a ‘flee’ response by activating your large muscles groups through running, biking, or otherwise propelling yourself through space ‘away from the danger’, as close to the activation // awareness that you have adrenaline // cortisol // sympathetic nervous system reactions flowing through your body.

I believe giving each other the grace of space would go a long was in preventing violence by navigating a cornered // trapped fight response into the less harmful flight response.

Here is your permission slip to buck trauma-generating norms, from an extensively therapeutically trained, nervous system nerd :

FREE YOURSELF FROM NON-TRAUMA INFORMED SOCIAL CONVENTIONS THAT CREATE DIS-EASE. GET AWAY. FLEE

Facebook link for additional discussion and comments :

Excessive Empathy // Fawning as Trauma Response

photo by Marcela Coors

Excessive Empathy // Fawning as Trauma Response

‘You are prioritizing safety to others to the point that you become dangerous to yourself’.

I found myself saying to an overly-compassionate client describing classic fawning behavior.

As I finalize ‘Guide for Guides : Ethical Psychedelic Spaceholding’ the realization I came to post-graduate school for therapy returns – most are unaware that beyond fight or flight there are additional trauma responses that include freezing & fawning / appeasing.

Fawning involves hyper vigilance in scanning for the socioemotional cues of those around you & prioritizing taking care of the needs of others over yourself.

Although in small doses this can be seen as pro-social empathy / compassion, when this behavior interferes with your capacity for self-care, it could be due to an involuntary survival response.

When caretaking others becomes a compulsive response to create safety in your environment as a prerequisite for your internal safety or ability to care for yourself, it is often due to childhood trauma in which a primary caregiver required care from you as a child, or a setting in which it was unsafe / judged for you to express your needs.

Our current culture does not acknowledge the more ‘social’ trauma response of fawning, and those of us acculturated as female are particularly steered towards fawning as encouraged behavior.

Pulling upon my studies and client experience with those who have a primary orientation towards fawning as their trauma response, I will share my reliable recommendations for how to create sovereignty from fawning. These insights will also be helpful to create social spaciousness for those who describe themselves as over empathetic or hypersensitive.

Facebook post link for additional comments // discussion : https://www.facebook.com/xrazma/posts/3088511434703777

Somatic Seed Saving

What somatic seeds are you saving ?


 Somatic Soul Nutrition ::

Grief as praise

Gratitude for what had been previously taken for granted

what z SomanautZ were privileged to birth into being

A new way of being together in deep delight,

corporeally collaborating via

SomaSenZ :

In dance-bodywork, restful repose space-creating pauses, & smooth  stretching,

Mutual massage multiplying benefits of stacking functions & bodies

Empathetic embodiment entangling : We cannot do this alone

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“I need all the nutrition”

Heard at z end :

How are you feeding your emotional, physical nutrition my friend?

How are you tending to your body temple, your psyche, your soul?

Living as an inspiring mirror amplifier aiding you to hear the voice of your inner wisdom is my goal
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Beloved, treat yourself tenderly in these times of transformation :

Slow down, rest, dream, and in watching :

let the grief settle as soft snow upon the memories of what has been put on pause, so that we gain clarity for what matters to our shared hearts

These moments of meandering in memory guide us to what we are willing to put forth energy into bringing back :
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What seeds are you saving?.

What are you Cultivating?
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Z video story : As heart-core Heart Tribe healers, we towed squished-out Body Bliss Wonder Wagons behind our bikes to have a mobile massage platform to gift bodywork anywhere on playa.

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📹  @erikperpheal at @abraxasdragon weds night / Thursday sunrise procession to Temple : 2017.Custom leather forest fairy boots by @treadlightgear

#burningman2020 #burningman #burningmanstyle #burningmanfestival #burningman2017 #ttitd #industwetrust #bodywork #massage #bodyplay #contactimprov #contactimprovisation #dancelife #dancer #bodyworkers #somatics #somatic #somaticexperiencing #somatichealing #bodyhealing #festivalculture #festivaloutfit #festivalclothing #festivalfashion #bodywisdom #bodybliss #assistedstretching #transformationalfestival #playamagic #theplayaprovides